Wednesday, 19 February 2014

A Love letter to my Champion

Dear Sonshine
When I look at you today, I can sigh a thousands sighs of relief over and over and over again. How far you have come and what a journey we went through last 2-3 years! I am simply grateful that everything turned out good.
Remember when you were 3 years old? How you were barely speaking and got me so terribly worried? Even when you spoke, your pronunciation was way off. Do you recall how your worried mom whisked you away to see a speech therapist? Only to have you speak accurately the very next day!
Then when you turned 4, I became increasingly worried because you were not interested in any social interaction. It was always common to see you absorbed in your own play at one corner and your peers in another. In preschool, the teacher would say how quiet you were and how you'd avoid eye contact. I was worried enough to send you for an assessment even though at home you were like any other kid with good responses & eye contact & showed no other signs of developmental delays.
Turns out that you are alright. You are the way you are because you are. :) Later, I read up on introverts and I felt I was literally reading about you. (That's when I also learnt that some introverts avoid eye contact too)
While I was busy worrying and scouting for answers, you were slowly, very slowly emerging from your shell. You started by playing and talking with one, just one, friend. After a whole year or so, you began to play with kids you meet at the playground. With each birthday mark, you became more and more comfortable & interested in interacting with people. It is also evident in your eye contact with others that you are gaining more confidence in social settings.
Just last night, I saw how you played with your peers whom you met only the second time, how you chatted with the girl- it made me really proud how far you have come. I was once again reminded that all that behaviour was unheard & unseen of you years ago. Did you know I heaved another sigh of great relief and thankfulness?

I remember worrying about how you would cope in primary school. I worried that the teacher would call me up and suggest that you are not suitable for school. Thank God, those fears were unfounded. You are doing excellently well as recorded by the teacher in her weekly report. Can I just say, 'PHEW!'?
I cannot help but swell with pride whenever I am reminded of your progress. To others, this is nothing or even taken for granted. But those days of worrying & crying over your future was not fun at all; it made me appreciate your growth & progress even more. I don't care if you are far behind your peers (or even ahead for that matter), all I care is that you make improvements. I remind myself to compare you with you and not some other kid. When I do that, I see great progress and it makes me want to shout it out-too bad that others read it as bragging. In any case, seeing your marked improvement, you do deserve some bragging rights baby, :).
My only regret is that I was so caught up with worry during those years that I pushed you so hard to come out of your shell. I was so absorbed in doing that, that I forgot to enjoy you. But you always kept your composure, smile, joy and love despite it all. You're an amazing kid, you know that, son? You truly are. You are a champion in your own rights! Mummy loves you more than you will ever know! I am glad that I am enjoying  you more and your sillyness. I'm looking forward to more victorious years ahead with you Champion! MUAKS!
Your Sweet heart
(Yes, he calls me that)

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