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Wednesday 11 November 2015

I see many proud parents posting on social media about their children getting award for being top in this or that. This is even more prevalent during the year end where most schools award their top students. 

I am tempted in many ways too to 'shout' it out on my social media sites. I mean we all want to tell the world how proud we are of our kids don't we? 

However, I always hold myself back. At most, I share with my immediate family like my parents, in-laws and my sister. That's it. Unless someone asked me, I wouldn't share. 

It's not that I am not proud of my child but I have my reservations. For one, I've been at the place where my child receives an award, I've also been at that place where other children were awarded but not mine. Let's be honest here, it sucks being the latter. This is especially hard when you see postings of other 'star' kids everywhere you turn except your own. 

As much as I want to shout it at the top of my lungs, I made it a point not to shout too loudly. Because, just because, I feel for the parents whose children didn't get any recognition. I bet they already feel bad enough, I don't need to flaunt and talk all day about my child's prizes. When I'm that parent, the last thing I need is for another mom to come and wave their child's trophy at me. Even when I didn't feel bad about it, I eventually would, if I keep hearing non-stop about this child being awarded for this and that. It is like the people in the world wouldn't let me off until I concede that my child isn't that good as that kid next door.

I don't post about my child's achievements on social media for another reason. If I do it, I feel I will be putting unnecessary pressure on my child. If I post his awards it's like putting him on the pedestal for the world to see. But what if he doesn't get any award the next year? Obviously I wouldn't post a thing on my Facebook. But to me it's akin to pulling him down from the pedestal. Almost like falling from grace. Would people see him any lesser? Would they make unnecessary judgement about him?

I would rather rejoice and celebrate amongst ourselves. Why the need to tell every Tom, Dick or Harry about how well your child is doing? I don't know about the others, I know when I do posts such things, it's for one reason. And I can honestly tell you it's purely for showing off. So that I can solicit praises from my friends. I want my son to have a good image in my friends' eyes. Sure, there may be some who genuinely wants to share. But for most? If we really dig into our hearts, I am sure most would agree with me. Posting about our child's acamedics results is more for our own glory than anything.

Maybe I think too much. I think how such postings would hurt someone else, how people would see my child, how genuine my motive is when I do it. But for me, I will restrain myself. I will not share or be sharing about my son's results on Facebook, this blog or any other social media no matter how well he does. The celebration shall stay within the walls of my family. I want to protect the other stakeholders, especially my own child, it's sometimes not about me, I and myself. Sometimes, it's also about people around us. 

2 comments:

  1. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Unfortunately I am often the parent at the receiving end of such "celebratory shout-outs". I know how it feels. I think some of us are brought up in an environment that values humility - we don't see the need to show-off our kids' achievements, we would prefer to be humble about it. People who constantly showcase their kids' achievements, desirable personality traits etc no longer see any value in being humble?
    Perhaps it is just the pervasiveness of Facebook in the lives of these people - they need to constantly post new posts/pics/statuses and garner as much social approval as possible...

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  2. Yes, I think it's the social media culture we are living in now. It's all about garnering more 'likes' and positive comments online. We have become a generation who craves for affirmation from the online world.

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